Writers Cramp

My posting has been sporadic at best - and there are many reason this may be so. A new baby to love and care for has a way of changing schedules and priorities. However, little babies go to bed at 8:00 and blogging time can be taken then.

Using the Internet to look for housing in a town two hours away can seem to take away from blogging time. How many nights we have sat in front of this screen checking on houses and using Google maps to check neighborhoods and locations. Yet, there have been evenings when the computer has sat - without use - without searches - yet, blogging and posting did not take place.

No, these are mere excuses. I know why the postings have been lacking. It is because a part of my life is coming to a close - and how do you write when there is so much that is changing. So many mixed emotions that it is most difficult to even know how to put them into words when speaking with my closest of friends; much wise pen them to words that can be read by anyone.

How do you close a chapter in your life that was six years in the making - and be able to put into words all the thoughts and feelings of your heart. I'm sorry - but I can't.

I can't find the words to explain how difficult it is to finish up a ministry that God specifically called us and equipped us to do. How do you put into words the emotions of your heart when you know this particular Wednesday night service was your last Wednesday night at the church you have called home for so long. How do you explain how unsure you are of the emotions you are facing; knowing that on Sunday the church home that you have known for six years will no longer be your church home - and life will move on.

How do I explain how excited I am about the future ministry God has called us to - the new church God has led us to - and the plans that await us in the near future? How do I explain this emotion - while still feeling the sadness of closing off life as I know it now? How do I put into words the questions that are facing us right now -

Where will we live? ...
Will there be enough money to live? ...
How far will our faith be tested?...

Can one explain just how hard it is to sell a home that you have put your heart and soul into?
How do you explain praying till your heart could almost break that God will sell the house - when in the next moment your thankful it has not sold - for it give opportunity to be able to stay just a bit longer in the abode you've called home for the last six years. The home that has housed your children's laughter for the past years. The home whose walls have witnessed the prayers and tears that go into life.

So many thoughts - so many different emotions - Life is moving on - and I am not really sure how to put it all into words.

"To every thing there is a season..."
Thanks so much for stopping by - I'm glad you did.


Becky K. said...

You just did....wiping the tears...

Becky K.

the Weigt Family said...

We are not ready for this post yet...:(

JoJo said...

You and Your Family are in my prayers.

Virginia's Sister