The Illusion

As sinful human beings, we have a dislike for truth. Keeping truth from surfacing has become a western culture pass time. I am afraid to say that much of our life is spent trying to keep the truth hidden.

We do it everyday.

If there is a gray hair - we find a way to hide it. Cover, dye, cut or style it away. No one can see - no one can know.

If there is a bulge that is too big - we find the control tops or spandex to keep the bulge in place. If that does not work - or if the truth is too difficult -there are staples, suction or bypass from which to choose.

Girls at young age learn the fine art of 'cover-up'. Years and years of wearing the makeup has caused us to look in disdain at the bathroom mirror each morning before the "mask" has been applied.

While none of these thing in themselves is wrong - I am afraid we have become so accustomed to the facade that we have a keen sense that no one is as they appear. We feel this to be true because, in the depths of our hearts, we know we are not truly as we appear.

We spend a good part of our days doing our best to cover, conceal or create an illusion to something that is different than what we really are.

Have we inoculated ourselves to truth?

Has our fear of realness - actually caused us to view truth as repulsive?

I fear many times we have succumbed to the devil's lies; and in so doing, he has successfully made the truth look fake!

The very essence of the Christian life is based on truth.

The truth of God's words.

The truth of His attributes.

But the truth does not stop at acknowledgement to the truth ABOUT God...

In order to walk with God - to commune with Him as Friend to friend -requires us to acknowledge the truth about us.

It requires us to see ourselves the way HE sees us.

To name our sin as He names it.

We have cloaked our own sin with our cliche phrases and think that we are being honest with Him. We have been deceived!

We aren't liars - we exaggerate...

We aren't angry - we're passionate.

We aren't proud and boastful - but rather driven and task oriented.

The problem is that in our own thinking - we will always look better than someone else.

It is how the lie works.

It is the reason why we cover. Our focus becomes making ourselves acceptable to others around us. If we are honest, often times our goal is to make ourselves look better than others.

When other's thoughts and acceptance become our standard-our standard ceases to being or having an absolute answer.

In and of ourselves - the lie will continue.

Is a close walk with God impossible?

In order to see ourselves as we should we have to ask Him to reveal it to us. Then,we have to grasp the reality when He show us - US.

We can't blame the pastor for the message that cut...

We can't blame our husband...

The kids aren't the reason either...

We have to embrace the truth as HE sees it.

It hurts...

It exposes...

But, it is the only way to His side.

When my desire is to be as close to His side as I possible can be - I have to be willing to allow the masks, the facades and the excuses of myself to be taken away.

I must see myself as I really am. Oh the joy when I embrace the truth.

Hurtful - yes, at first.

Here is the joy! As soon as the truth is seen - accepted - and responsibility taken -- then comes grace.

HIS grace.

He cleanses me - forgives me - and establishes me.

No more need for me to cover - HE covers me with His righteousness.

Oh the freedom that comes when there is no more pretence - only HIM.

"Nothing in my hands I bring simply to Thy cross I cling. Rock of ages cleft for me - let me hide myself in THEE!"

New Doors

We have been in for several hearing tests in the past few months. We had hoped there would be marked improvement in his hearing after we had his tubes put back into his ears. I knew it had not worked right when I kept hearing the "what?" question coming from the back seat of the van every time I talked to him.

The last hearing test revealed that his hearing has not improved - and has actually gotten worse. The process of getting a hearing aid for his one ear has been started. We are awaiting the insurance approval.

At this same time our church unveiled a new certificate program for church members. Each Sunday afternoon classes are given on various topics. Sign language was one of the new courses being offered! I have enrolled in the new class - and will start learning a new language. It was exciting to me to see how God had opened a door for me - without me even knowing it was there.

The doctor's do not know all the ends and outs of Zak's hearing issues. We will not be able to tell for quite awhile if he is going deaf - - but if we do have to cross the bridge - I want to be ready.

I am looking forward to the new challenge - and will be excited to teach Zak too!


I have an enemy.

He dislikes me.

He hates what I believe.

He has his sights set upon my destruction.

He has studied my behaviour.

I have a Redeemer.

He loves me - with an everlasting love.

He is truth - and desires me to know Him.

His end goal for me is better than anything I can ever imagine.

He knows me - since before I was born.

My Redeemer has gone before and made sure that I can have complete victory over my enemy. He fought the battle.

He won.

The victory is mine EVERY time my enemy attacks.

I have my Redeemer's WORD on it!

All I have to do is claim the victory and follow my Redeemer.

How many times I have not claimed the victory. How many times I have been blinded by my enemy's attacks because I was not close to my Redeemer's side!

The time has come - to claim the victory.

I am His and He is mine.

My enemy will gain no more ground.

My enemy has been rendered completely inoperable in my life!

Christ in me - and I in Him - the victory is mine.

I claim it.

The battle's victory is assured.

Thanks be to God who giveth us the victory - - every time!!


It looked like it might not happen...

but alas, it has all worked out.

I will let you in on a little secret - but don't tell anyone!

It will just us - my love and me! We are stealing away. Just the two of us. I feel about as excited as I did the day he asked me to marry him!!

Hope you have a wonderful weekend. We are looking forward to ours!!

Death To Self

My desire is for Christ to be seen in my life. I want when others see me they see Him...

-- in how I interact and treat my husband

--in how I talk with the children


Then I must be cleansed from self. Cleansed from the me...

--that wants my own way

--that is inconvenienced with little ones requests.

My prayer has been to Him - "Make me like YOU." Then I opened up my Bible for my devotions and read this in my devotional book:

Anything that springs from self, however small it may be, is sin. Self-energy or self-complacency in service is sin. Self-pity in trials or difficulties, self-seeking in business of Christian work, self indulgence in one's spare time, sensitiveness, touchiness, resentment and self-defense when we are hurt or injured by others, self-consciousness, reserve, worry, fear - - all spring from self and make our cups unclean.

If we will allow Him to show us what is in our cups and then give it to Him, He will cleanse them in the precious blood that still flows for sin. That does not mean mere cleansing from the guilt of sin, nor even from the stain of sin - though thank God both of these are true - but from the sin itself, whatever it may be. And as He cleanses our cups, so He fills them to overflowing with His Holy Spirit.

- Roy Hession, Calvary Road

My prayer rang out again, "Do it God... do it for me! Show me me - Make me just like You!!"

Waiting for Spring's Birth

Small hints of spring seem to be arriving...

...birds chirping early in the morning while I am doing my devotions (LOVE that sound!)

...sunshine showering my front room floor in the afternoon while the two little ones are down for their nap...

...the sound of dripping coming from off the roof as the snow changes form amidst a glowing sun

...a back yard bird house already being claimed and preperations made for a humble dwelling for a new family to be...

In my mind I can almost see...

...tulips and daffodils poking their heads up out of the ground

...Anna's Easter Dress as she runs to the van - (my mind also remember how last year she was toddling out to the van - my how a year changes things!)

...clothes blowing on the line as the crisp spring wind moves through the back yard

The air is still cool and the coats are still on the hangers in the front entry - - but in my heart spring is almost here!!